Beer Leaguers: Gumballhead, Brian Bannister, and Pat Neshek

Last night, The Common Man finished his dinner, put The Boy to bed, and came downstairs to find The Evil Dog had peed on the kitchen floor, despite having been walked not one hour before. Here was a situation that clearly called for a beer.

And so, The Common Man popped the top off of a Gumballhead, a wheat beer made by Three Floyds Brew Pub, in Munster, Indiana. The psychedelic foil label features a yellow creature (Google tells TCM it's a cat who may or may not also be the star of his own web comic) of some sort smoking a cigarette and sporting what appears to be a black eye. Written up the side of the bottle are the words, "It's not normal."

Since the retirement of world-class crazy man Turk Wendell, The Common Man can only think of two ball players who really resonate with this slogan as baseball's true odd ducks. Brian Bannister, the starter for the Kansas City Royals, is the son of former Major League pitcher Floyd Bannister (who won 134 games from 1977-1992), which could lead one to believe that the younger Bannister is old school and conservative, status quo loving legacy. Banny is a fan of sabermatricians around the blogosphere; he is a strong believer in Defense Independent Pitching stats, and is thoughtful in how he dissects his own performance. He has a Bachelors in Fine Arts degree from USC, is a photography enthusiast and supports artists working in the Scottsdale area. Just his mere presence makes the Royals almost watchable in non-Greinke outings. Bannister always has something interesting to say, such that it's no wonder that Banny has made a disciple out of no less a writer than Joe Posnanski.

Likewise, Twins reliever Pat Neshek has made tremendous fans online for being one of the first active players to really blog about his experiences in the minor and major leagues. His insight and his enthusiasm are both greatly appreciated by his readers, as Neshek serves as a proxy for their broken dreams of never having a chance to make the big leagues. Indeed, while you and The Common Man may never have even played high school ball, we always felt we knew and respected the game far more than those who played it. Neshek's baseball card and autograph collections, his openess in talking about both, and his genuine awe at being a Major Leaguer, is refreshing for fans like The Common Man, who feel like they finally have one of their own to root for. Neshek's delivery, the jerky, whip-like, side arm action that fools righty and lefty batters alike also is a reminder of just how different Neshek is from your average major leaguer.

There is, however, one central difference between Brian Bannister and Pat Neshek. Neshek has thrown 120 innings at the big league level, and is coming off of a major injury (Tommy John Surgery). By no means is his full recovery assured, no matter how much The Common Man wishes it so. Still, in those 120 innings, The Freakshow has struck out 142 batters, and walked just 37 (in a row?). He is overpowering, and has an incredibly filthy slider. It's no exaggeration to say that, if he's healthy, Pat Neshek is absolutely nasty. Brian Bannister, on the other hand, The Common Man is sad to say is just not a good major league pitcher. After an exceptionally positive start to his career (14-10, 3.95, low HR/9 and BB/9 rates from 2006-2007, very low BABIP), the American League (or Lady Luck) seems to have caught up to him. In 2008, his HR/9 jumped (as did his K/BB ratio, however), and his BABIP also rose by 60 points (to .316). It held relatively steady in 2009. In the last two years, Banny has gone just 16-28 with a 5.29 ERA. It's clear that Bannister simply isn't a serviceable starter on a competitive franchise, and that he's not part of the long term solution for the Royals. Though he'll probably make a hell of a pitching coach some day.

And so, The Common Man is forced to make Brian Bannister the official Gumballhead of Major League Baseball. For one thing, he's got a lot of knowledge in that head of his, and some gumballs are awfully big. But more importantly, just like Bannister is not a good pitcher (no matter how much we want him to be), Gumballhead is not a good beer. Now, in the interest of fairness, TCM is generally not a wheat beer fan anyway, but this brew seems particularly egregious. It's exceedingly light, to the point where you can't really taste the beer. Rather, you get a splash of water across the bow, before a sharp hoppiness washes over the whole of your mouth. That's followed almost immediately by the most lemony aftertaste that The Common Man can remember having from a beer. And that aftertaste doesn't dissipate either. It sticks with you. It haunts you. It keeps coming back, and just gets more strident and insistent sip after sip, like Yankees in their second at bats against young Banny. Eventually, the aftertaste starts teeing off on your taste buds, and you run for a palette cleanser. And this might be The Common Man's imagination, but there might be the faintest smell of stale urine. Frankly, life's too short to drink this beer, unless you've got no other choice on hand. Fortunately for Bannister, the Royals don't.

Fighting the Urge to Panic

Hey, remember when The Common Man was supposed to go to Arizona this weekend. Yeah, not so much. It turns out that The Boy’s fever and cough stemmed from a mild case of pneumonia, which pretty much made flying a bad idea and relegated him to the couch for much of the weekend. The trip is being rescheduled, perhaps for the last weekend in March, when TCM hopes to enjoy the last bits of Spring Training before teams head north.

Someone else didn’t exactly have the weekend he expected, and The Common Man is feeling his pain today. Twins closer Joe Nathan was shut down on Saturday after experiencing some elbow soreness. Nathan is an elite closer who has had a 1.87 ERA and averaged 41 saves a season in his six years as the Twins’ closer. His K/9 is an otherworldly 11.1 and his K/BB is a terrific 4.32. Though he has typically been limited to around 70 innings, his overwhelming dominance at the end of games is a comfort to Twins fans that they can stop worrying when they have a lead after 8.

At this point, Nathan and the Twins are saying they are not terribly concerned, but their actions are merely “precautionary.” The Twins have not been the most forthcoming organization with accurate medical information recently. The troubles that relievers Jesse Crain, Juan Rincon, and Pat Neshek, OF Rondell White, and 3B Joe Crede underwent never were really addressed efficiently, and all five have suffered significant time and performance loss as a result. The Twins’ insistence that Neshek rehab his elbow injury, in particular, was troubling, given that the best case scenario involved him getting back after several months on the DL and the worst (and far more likely case) had him missing a year with Tommy John surgery. Alas, the rehab didn’t take, and Neshek needed the surgery anyway, and has been out for nearly two seasons after being one of the best set-up men in the majors in 2007, relegated to rehab, blogging, and marathon sessions of autograph signing. All of which is to say that The Common Man isn’t taking what the Twins have to say at face value, but he’s hoping for the best.

Fortunately, even if the Twins were forced to break camp without Nathan (who is terrific with fans, by the way), the team is far better prepared for it than in years past. Yes, Nathan is an elite reliever and is head and shoulders above the rest of the bullpen. But his actual impact on the club’s fortunes is relatively low, especially this year. First and foremost, the Twins have done a good job this offseason in upgrading their offense. The outfield is better, 2B is better, 3B is more reliable on a consistent basis, SS has been upgraded, and DH is stronger. Even the bench is stronger. Barring a rash of injuries, the club will not have to turn regularly to Matt Tolbert or Alexi Casilla, and will not have to bring in questionable offensive players such as Orlando Cabrera. Teams that have the ability to outslug their opponents generally have less need of a truly Nathan-level closer, since they have fewer one-run leads to protect in the final frame.

And for those late innings, the Twins have put together a stronger overall bullpen this year than in year’s past. In 2009, the Twins benefited from three terrific seasons from Nathan, Matt Guerrier, and Jose Mijares, who combined to post a 2.26 ERA in 206 innings. However, the team also had to endure rough performances out of the back of their bullpen, particularly from Bobby Keppel (4.83 ERA in 54 IP), Jesse Crain (4.70 ERA in 52 IP), R.A. Dickey (4.62 ERA in 64 IP), and Luis Ayala (a deceptive 4.18 in 32 IP). Instead, in addition to Guerrier and Mijares, the team will get a full season out of the intimidating Jon Rauch (3.65 ERA in 320 IP over the past four years), Clay Condrey (3.16 in 111 IP over the past two years). Jesse Crain remains with the club and hopes to bounce back from a subpar and injury filled (balky shoulder) 2009. He may not be the same pitcher who won 12 games and had a 2.71 ERA in 2005, but a return to the 3.50 ERA of 2006 and 2008 is likely if his shoulder holds. And, of course, 2010 will see the return of the aforementioned, Frisbee-throwing, and hopefully full-strength, Neshek to the Twins’ pen.

Indeed, if the Twins do lose Nathan, this could create an additional bullpen spot or spots for last year’s season-saving swingman Brian Duensing (3.64 ERA in 84 IP) or minor-league phenoms Rob Delaney (9.2 K/9, 5.37 BB/K, .994 WHIP, and 2.41 ERA in 4 minor league seasons) and Anthony Slama (13.3 K/9, 3.66 BB/K, 1.04 WHIP, 1.86 ERA in 3 minor league seasons).

Not that losing Nathan is a good thing. Undoubtedly, the effectiveness of the Twins’ pen would suffer somewhat, and that’s an important consideration in what could be a tight division in 2010. But the Twins are well-prepared in that they have less need this year for a lights-out closer and more quality options for the pen than any year since 2005 or 2006. Which is why The Common Man isn’t pushing the panic button yet.