Thursday, November 27, 2008


It has been a wonderful Thanksgiving, and The Common Man hopes that you have had a happy Thanksgiving as well. The morning began with a breakfast of birthday cake for the whole family, kindly provided by The Deacon and his Lovely and Delightful in celebration of The Boy and The Uncommon Wife. After that, The Common Man faked a sore leg in order to avoid driving the go-cart-esque Versa. However, when God punished The Common Man's cowardice by draining the car's battery, The Deacon came through with a battery charger and The Common Family was able to head even further into rural America to spend dinner with The Uncommon Wife's family. To give you an idea of the rurality The Common Man is talking about here, the family has chickens...and cows live down the road. The nearest store is 20 minutes away. It's out there (not that The Common Man is complaining, he just wants to give you context). Of course, the day pinnacled with a massive dinner of turkey, mashed potatoes, mashed turnips, stuffing, rolls, pumpkin bread, creamed onions, green bean cassarole, cranberry sauce, corn, olives, and pickles. And after the meal, The Common Man retired to the couch to watch a surprisingly entertaining You Don't Mess With the Zohan with the age-appropriate members of the fam. Good times all around.

Anyway, because The Common Man is a lazy writer, bereft of good ideas, The Common Man wants to tell you some of what he's thankful for this holiday season.

1) A beautiful wife who supports her husband in all of his endeavors, except the ones likely to burn down the house.

2) An adorable two-year old who can count to thirteen and sings his ABCs while running in circles around the dining room while others are trying to eat their turkey.

3) Good friends with a spare bedroom and a battery charger.

4) An extensive collection of baseball cards that The Common Man will someday pass along to his son as evidence of his father's incredible nerdiness.

5) Stephen Colbert's Christmas Special and nutmeg for his eggnog.

6) An Obama-centric 2009-2013.

7) That gas has fallen down under $2/gallon, making life a little easier for Americans.

8) A space like this to rant and rave and talk in the third-person, and loyal readers like you.

9) Jack Daniels and ice.

10) The coming Christmas season, generosity of spirit, faith in goodness, and exploding turkeys:

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.


LT Rob said...

Common Man,
This is LT Rob, I just found your new online home. Happy Thanksgiving!

The Common Man said...

The Common Man is ecstatic to have you back, Lt. Rob. Happy Thanksgiving to you as well. And congratulations to you on your retirement from our nation's service. He hopes that you and the new Mrs. Lt. Rob enjoy living back stateside again, and suspects that your decision to leave was timed to coincide with a certain inauguration.

By the way, The Common Man heard a good one the other day (from his priest, no less):

Why are all the chaplains in the Navy?

It's the only branch that can read.

Also, what do you call a Marine who can read?