Friday, December 19, 2008

Blowing In the Breeze

The Common Man grew up in and around snow. He enjoys snow. He has enjoyed taking The Boy out into the snow and teaching him about snow angels and snow balls. When the snow is wet enough, he will enjoy teaching The Boy about snow men. He even enjoys shoveling, as it's good exercise. But today, as The Common Man spent more than an hour and a half shoveling a foot of snow off his driveway and sidewalk, he almost made a run for it. Fortunately, The Common Man has a manly amount of patience and warm weather seems far, far away. So he stayed put.

As a result of the shoveling, tonight The Common Man is sore and tired. His arms and legs ache, and he has a cramping feeling in the small of his back (though it's not nearly as painful as realizing his self-imposed moratorium on political blogging means he won't be talking about the trolls in California who want to nullify those same-sex marriages already on the books). It's enough to make The Common Man reconsider The Uncommon Wife's suggestion to buy a snowblower.

Sure, The Common Man would get less exercise, but as he watched his neighbors, one-by-one, breeze through their driveways, The Common Man was forced to reconsider his position. Think of the time saved! Think of the fun of pushing around an awesome and loud piece of equipment, seeing the snow fly in a high arc off the driveway and into the yard.

The Common Man, however, has dedicated himself to being as manly and awesome as he can be. So this raises the question, is it manlier to shovel or to snowblow? On the one hand, physical activity is entirely manly. Even in the snow, it's possible to work up a good sweat. And though your muscles burn and back aches as you return the shovel to the garage, you have the manly satisfaction of knowing you have done good work. On the other, guys love their toys. A big, powerful snowblower would totally be manly, wouldn't it?

The Common Man solicits your opinions in the comments below. Shovel or snowplow? And feel free to vote in the new poll on the right.


The Uncommon Wife said...

My sweet love, I hope as you consider this decision you will remember that The Uncommon Wife is too much of a princess to shovel snow. I hope if you decide to shovel that for your sake it is an easy winter. Otherwise, after watching you today I fear I shall be The Uncommon Widow.

Maybe you're right about the snowblower, though. In that case might I also suggest we turn in our car for a horse and buggy.

The Founding Father said...

Coming from a man who was pondering the exact same question, I've already made the decision (rather my bank account has) to go one more year with the shovel in hand.

That said, I think the Manliest way to rid your property of snow is to get a plow for your pickup. Wake the boy a few hours before the sun rises and treat him to some gas station hot chocolate and a coffee for yourself. Sneak in a tin of tobacco and head into the surrounding neighborhoods. Spend the morning bonding with the boy and plowing strangers driveways (targeting the needy, old and eye-candy types of course). Bond with the boy and teach him a valuable lesson on giving... all before his saturday morning cartoons come on. He'll remember it for life.

Be A Man.
-The Founding Father

Wes said...

Good catch on the Marlins thing, too much late night copy and paste with the positional format. Write 30 of them and you'll understand :)

I mentioned Cantu where Uggla is, I'm pretty sure they are going to try and trade him as his value is as high as it can be after his big season as you mentioned. Guess we'll see!

Robert Hogan said...

I'm a sucker for tradition, so I would say, stick with the shovel. Then again, I also gave up on the push-reel mower for a gas powered grass eater.