Stupid Explosion Tricks, or The Common Man Takes the Day Off

After two mega-long weekend posts about A-Rod and the scum of humanity (which are not necessarily the same thing, he feels compelled to remind you), The Common Man is taking it easy today. Maybe by tomorrow the whole A-Rod thing will have blown over and The Common Man can talk about puppies or something. What do you think the odds are? In the meantime, The Common Man doesn't want you to leave empty handed. So, for your amusement, here, is a Stupid Man Trick, courtesy of The Founding Father over at The Mantuary:



Notice how the beer can ricochets solidly off the runner's noggin. That's a powerful arm right there. Like the Roger Clemens of the Preakness Infield. Oh, see. Now The Common Man's talking about steroids again. Will this topic not go away for five minutes?!? To make himself, and you, feel better, here's an explosion. Feel free to picture Clemens, A-Rod, Bonds, Palmeiro, McGwire, and the whole of the mainstream media strapped to a rocket and ready to be shot into space:



Cathartic, no?

Everything Old Is New Again

The Common Man is enjoying quality time with The Boy and The Uncommon Wife tonight. After all the excitement of the holidays, he's really happy to be sitting down to watch A Bug's Life as a family, followed by The Black Dahlia with the Mrs. Then it's the big countdown, champagne, a big kiss, and a brand new year.

The Common Man wishes you and yours a very happy New Year. He can't wait for another year with you all, even though it's only been six months thusfar. As it's a quiet night, The Common Man will be posting tomorrow, and forever thereafter. He hopes you join him in the conversation. In the meantime, enjoy the fireworks.

Welcome One and All

The Common Man has been fortunate enough to be blogrolled by the lovely and delightful Dr. Isis today, and he wishes to welcome any and all of you who visit here from her divine site. If you want a better sense of what the site is about, I'd look here for The Common Man's extended exchange with BikeMonkey on the nature of religion and atheism, here for The Common Man's recommendation of Firefly, the single greatest show ever, and here for The Common Man's treatise on spanking and what he will do to the first teacher who ever lays a hand on The Boy (The Common Man's two-year old son). Or feel free to browse on your own. The Common Man also reviews film, books, and beer, and talks extensively about politics and popular culture. And about being a man, a father, and a son. And, in honor of your visit, here are some fireworks:



And an idiot sticking his hand in an alligator's mouth:

Film at 11

Since The Common Man's virus seems to have run its course (thank God), he's happy to share virally goodness with all y'all.

-- First off, The Common Man doesn't care who you are and what your political, social, or philosophical beliefs are. If everyone in the nation can't come together and call this literal take on A-ha's classic '80s hit "Take On Me" comedy genius, he doesn't know what everyone is fighting for.



But, and here's where The Common Man realizes that he's lame (but lame in a totally awesome kind of way), when he comics guy breaks through into our world, how is he going to survive? He'll have no social security number, no references, and, frankly, he's awfully sweaty and gross looking. He can't actually expect the chick he just met to let him move in and freeload off her, can he?

-- Since time immemorial, man has struggled with the ultimate question: What would happen if Superman and Batman were real, and they met? Thankfully, the question has finally been answered, thanks to College Humor. Also, it turns out that Superman is kind of a douche.

-- The Common Man is, of course, stallwart and true, and unfazed by things that would frighten most men to their cores. But he is having nightmares. And the nightmares look like this:



Real or no, that is one scary kid. Even though he's as tall and well-proportioned as a two-year old can be, The Common Man thinks he's going to put The Boy on a diet.

--Finally, because he hasn't shown one in a while...EXPLOSION!!!



Bonus: It's narrated by Adam West. What more could you want?

Stupid Man Tricks

This is going to be a regular feature here at The Common Man. Men do stupid things because it is in their nature, and The Common Man wants to celebrate that unabashed, uncomplicated, unwise bravery and brashness. So, every day or two, he will provide you with more evidence that the male species is just a little off. Just a little different. Just a little in need of some therapy.

The Common Man promised explosions, and he supposes he must oblige in his first edition of Stupid Man Tricks. Explosions, of course, are awesome, something The Common Man tried (in vain) to explain to a seven year old girl who was playing in the back yard with The Boy. Perhaps she just hasn't seen the right explosion. Or maybe women just will never get it. The beauty, the power, and the stupidity in just blowing something up.

And without further ado:


Thoughts anyone? The Common Man is afraid his first effort may be hard to top.