The Twins Facial-Hair Face-Off: Sweeter-than-the-sweetest-honey Sixteen

Well, the first round of the Twins Facial-Hair Face-Off is in the books, and we’ve got 16 winners ready to move on to round 2. First, the results, and then we’ll follow that up with the second round voting.


The Griffith Region
#8 Ron Davis vs. #1 Ken Landreaux
#8 Davis 3%
#1 Landreaux 97%
Davis received three sympathy votes.

#5 Larry Hisle vs. #4 Alvaro Espinoza
#5 Hisle 47.5%
#4 Espinoza 52.5%

#6 Lyman Bostock vs. #3 Gary Ward
#6 Bostock 14.1%
#3 Gary Ward 85.9%

#7 Ron Washington vs. #2 Dan Ford
#7 Washington 35.4%
#2 Dan Ford 64.6%

Pohlad Region
#8 Dan Schatzeder vs. #1 Gary Gaetti
#8 Schatzeder 2.5%
#1 Gaetti 97.5%
The G-Man is just way too dominant, and feasts on left-handed pitchers.

#5 Frank Viola vs. #4 Tom Brunansky
#5 Viola 26.3%
#4 Brunansky 73.8%

#6 Bert Blyleven vs. #3 Juan Berenguer
#6 Blyleven 47.5%
#3 Berenguer 52.5%
This was incredibly close until the last hour or so, with the two tied at one point.

#7 Keith Atherton vs. #2 Jeff Reardon
#7 Atherton 8.8%
#2 Reardon 91.3%
Fear the beard.

Worst-to-First Region
#8 Dan Gladden vs. #1 Brian Harper
#8 Gladden 29.4%
#1 Harper 70.6%
Gladden's mustache gets the thrashing it so richly deserves.

#5 Rick Aguilera vs. #4 Junior Ortiz
#5 Aguilera 69.6%
#4 Ortiz 30.4%
A strong upset here.

#6 Kirby Puckett vs. #3 Jack Morris
#6 Puckett 13%
#3 Morris 87%
Kirby didn't have a chance.  But he's in the Hall of Fame.

#7 Wally Backman vs. #2 Shane Mack
#7 Backman 14.5%
#2 Mack 85.5%
Backman doesn't even get a callback interview.

21st Century Region
#8 Nick Punto vs. #1 Johan Santana
#8 Punto 11.1%
#1 Santana 88.9%
This region is so top-heavy, it's kind of unfair.

#5 Francisco Liriano vs. #4 Nick Blackburn
#5 Liriano 47.2%
#4 Blackburn 52.8%
Apparently nobody else gets the chinstrap phenomenon either.

#6 Scott Baker vs. #3 Eddie Guardado
#6 Baker 18.1%
#3 Guardado 81.9%
Eddie G. is the sacrificial lamb that gets to face...

#7 Justin Morneau vs. #2 Carl Pavano
#7 Morneau 5.6%
#2 Pavano 94.4%
Just a route.  Which we've come to expect from the Pav-stache.

So, we bid adieu to 15 worthy competitors and Ron Davis, and move on to the next stage of voting. Here are the matchups for Round 2:

(Note:  The Second Round voting is closed.  For results and to vote in round 3, please click here.)


Griffith Region
#1 Ken Landreaux vs. #4 Alvaro Espinoza

Landreaux's mustache was a stunt double on Starsky & Hutch.  Espinoza's is so precise, but the oversized glasses perhaps overshadow it.

#3 Gary Ward vs. #2 Dan Ford

It's probably not ok to admit this, but I get these mustaches confused a lot.  It's like LaVelle Neal III and Al Newman.

Pohlad Region
#1 Gary Gaetti vs. #4 Tom Brunansky

Gaetti's mustache is so bushy, and Bruno's is so badass.  This is a harder choice than it looks.

#3 Juan Berenguer vs. #2 Jeff Reardon

Berenguer used to set up for Reardon, but will he take a back seat in the facial hair department?

Worst-to-First Region
#1 Brian Harper vs. #5 Rick Aguilera

Harper's still got your Trans-Am.  This time, he's taking you to the Spearmint Rhino for the floor show and a seafood buffet. Don't eat the shrimp.  Aggy's wants to know when Picard will die so he can take command of the Enterprise.

#3 Jack Morris vs. #2 Shane Mack

Jack Morris's mustache is really the only HOF worthy part of his game.  Hello ladies, you haven't forgetten about Shane Mack again, have you?

21st Century Region
#1 Johan Santana vs. #4 Nick Blackburn

Santana's goatee is the definition of precision.  Blackburn's mustache, like his repertoire, seems to lack depth.

#3 Eddie Guardado vs. #2 Carl Pavano

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
A moment of silence for Eddie's goatee.  Now, go vote for the Pav-stache.  You know you want to.
 

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Thanks for voting, and check back tomorrow for the results!